THIS is making me so mad and angry, and i’m not sure what “this” is. So I’m going to write it out..or at least try. Maybe then I can trigger what is making me so emotional and moody.

A large part of my mood swings could be due to school. I’m not stressed yet, but the pre-stressed. Stressed about being stressed in the future, that is. Taking 5 AP classes could have been a big mistake..I’m in for a hell of a year.

I think it might have something to do with friends, and Preston, and vlogging. Preston has become basically my best friend, and has left for college, so naturally i miss him. And we started this vlogging thing (video blogging), and I don’t really know if I’m as funny as a ‘vlogger’ should be. And when I am being funny, I feel like I’m trying to hard, and it’s obvious. I obviously overthink things way too much. My mom and dad also told me they want me to stop, considering anyone on the internet can watch them. Which leads me to my next point.

I want to go to freaking college already. I’m sick of my mom riding my as about EVERYTHING. From academics to what I’m wearing to what I’m doing..EVERY SECOND OF THE DAY. I’m sick of being babied. I’m sick of being nagged. And being close to Kels and Preston and all them, they have endless amounts of freedom. And I’m held down by a) my parents, b) my responsibilities to my studies, and c)…i don’t really have a c. Anyways, I’m sick of it!

And pres is away at college, so i miss late night mcd’s runs my best friend, and i don’t feel like bothering him ever cause i feel like he’s like…doing awesome college things 24/7, and he really doesn’t have time for little old lace.

Whatthefuckever.

And I sort of have this growing curiosity about this not so cute guy who has a dick rep in like all of my classes? But i sort of had a thing for his brother? It’s complicated and school is exhausting me. AND I’ve got to finish this Lit essay.
Okay, this is random, but even though James is long gone and all…I still really hate him. Sorry, I can’t help it.